I was cleaning and rearranging furniture in my small one bedroom apartment after moving to Houston from the country. You know how it is when you’re cleaning house – you start cleaning one area and somehow you end up somewhere else with another huge mess. I started in the living room and kitchen area of my small apartment. You would think in an area that small it wouldn’t be a problem deciding where to put what. I mean, there are only four walls.
The last time I rearranged furniture, I got in a fight with my nine foot couch. Moving that piece of furniture was like trying to push Mount Rushmore through an opening the size of a quarter. I bought that old couch back in 1980 something. The (ex) husband took off to go hunting and left me home with the young’uns – again! And what does one do when the hubby goes off to the deer lease? Why go shopping of course!
My first couch, after raising the kids, the ex, several dogs, a wide variety of cats, one guinea pig and two ferrets was down to the bare wood and springs. So, I decided to have a new one in place when the (ex) hubby returned home.
I found it at a garage sale - of course. The owner said they never sat on it and had kept it in their formal living room. I have a feeling their “formal living room” was probably in another state.
I loaded the monstrosity into the back of the pickup, the kids helped me move the old sofa out and we installed the new one in its place. (Ex) hubby arrived home the next day, tired and weary from a long weekend of hunting and bonding with his buddies and nature – a man’s work is never done.
He sat down to relax and watch some football. Six weeks later, he realized there was something different in the living room. (Someday I’m going to get rid of that old couch too!)
This time, it was the oversized recliner and I that had a problem. I should say the recliner, my cat Sweet Pea and I.
She loves to play hide-and-seek, and she chose the recliner to use as her hiding place. I had to turn the chair upside down, which took some doing – kind of like wresting with a sumo wrestler – all girth and no give. I ended up using a squirt bottle of water to get her out of there. I got to sit in a wet recliner and Sweet Pea had to find another place to hide.
The most fun rearranging furniture I’ve ever had was when I moved everything while (ex) hubby was gone (to the deer lease of course for more – um – bonding). Sometimes he would trip over a table or chair that wasn’t there before and I would hear him swearing all the way out to his truck. Yes, ladies, if you ever want to get back at that man in your life, rearrange the furniture – it works every time.
I finally had almost all of my furniture in the middle of my apartment when I noticed my walls. Well, one wall in particular that is. I have what I call my rogues’ gallery on the big wall in my den.
I have the standard graduation, wedding and group-shot pictures of my children. But I also have some that take a little explaining.
There’s one of my daughter lying out in the sun by our pool, laughing. What you don’t see is my daughter’s best friend doing her best to keep her horse out of the pool. Every time she rode her horse to our house, that animal seemed to think he needed to take a dip.
One of my favorite pictures is my son in his cute little white tuxedo and red cummerbund going to his eighth grade graduation dance. His date, a full head taller than said son, wore a red dress that matched his cummerbund!
Chauffeuring for the evening was none other than his big sister (he thought she would be better than having mom hanging around all night) and she also was instructed to wear red.
That was one of those nights when he begged me to “please stay home this time, Mom.” Are you kidding? Me, stay home and miss this party? Not on your life!!
Oh, I let them get a good head start before I got myself cleaned up and ready to go. I arrived about an hour or so after they did. We spent the rest of the evening playing “catch me if you can.”
He was just so cute in that tuxedo – thank goodness for his taller date – made it easy for me to follow them. I used up two rolls of film that night and then had to borrow from one of the other parents – all of us causing our darlings the same kind of embarrassment.
Then I have a really good picture of son at about two years old sitting in – not on – the commode - only his head and legs can be seen. I use this picture for blackmail purposes.
So, I finally got my furniture rearranged the way I want it this time. I’m sure I’ll change my mind in about three months or so and have to do it all over again. One thing I won’t change - are the pictures on the wall.
The last time I rearranged furniture, I got in a fight with my nine foot couch. Moving that piece of furniture was like trying to push Mount Rushmore through an opening the size of a quarter. I bought that old couch back in 1980 something. The (ex) husband took off to go hunting and left me home with the young’uns – again! And what does one do when the hubby goes off to the deer lease? Why go shopping of course!
My first couch, after raising the kids, the ex, several dogs, a wide variety of cats, one guinea pig and two ferrets was down to the bare wood and springs. So, I decided to have a new one in place when the (ex) hubby returned home.
I found it at a garage sale - of course. The owner said they never sat on it and had kept it in their formal living room. I have a feeling their “formal living room” was probably in another state.
I loaded the monstrosity into the back of the pickup, the kids helped me move the old sofa out and we installed the new one in its place. (Ex) hubby arrived home the next day, tired and weary from a long weekend of hunting and bonding with his buddies and nature – a man’s work is never done.
He sat down to relax and watch some football. Six weeks later, he realized there was something different in the living room. (Someday I’m going to get rid of that old couch too!)
This time, it was the oversized recliner and I that had a problem. I should say the recliner, my cat Sweet Pea and I.
She loves to play hide-and-seek, and she chose the recliner to use as her hiding place. I had to turn the chair upside down, which took some doing – kind of like wresting with a sumo wrestler – all girth and no give. I ended up using a squirt bottle of water to get her out of there. I got to sit in a wet recliner and Sweet Pea had to find another place to hide.
The most fun rearranging furniture I’ve ever had was when I moved everything while (ex) hubby was gone (to the deer lease of course for more – um – bonding). Sometimes he would trip over a table or chair that wasn’t there before and I would hear him swearing all the way out to his truck. Yes, ladies, if you ever want to get back at that man in your life, rearrange the furniture – it works every time.
I finally had almost all of my furniture in the middle of my apartment when I noticed my walls. Well, one wall in particular that is. I have what I call my rogues’ gallery on the big wall in my den.
I have the standard graduation, wedding and group-shot pictures of my children. But I also have some that take a little explaining.
There’s one of my daughter lying out in the sun by our pool, laughing. What you don’t see is my daughter’s best friend doing her best to keep her horse out of the pool. Every time she rode her horse to our house, that animal seemed to think he needed to take a dip.
One of my favorite pictures is my son in his cute little white tuxedo and red cummerbund going to his eighth grade graduation dance. His date, a full head taller than said son, wore a red dress that matched his cummerbund!
Chauffeuring for the evening was none other than his big sister (he thought she would be better than having mom hanging around all night) and she also was instructed to wear red.
That was one of those nights when he begged me to “please stay home this time, Mom.” Are you kidding? Me, stay home and miss this party? Not on your life!!
Oh, I let them get a good head start before I got myself cleaned up and ready to go. I arrived about an hour or so after they did. We spent the rest of the evening playing “catch me if you can.”
He was just so cute in that tuxedo – thank goodness for his taller date – made it easy for me to follow them. I used up two rolls of film that night and then had to borrow from one of the other parents – all of us causing our darlings the same kind of embarrassment.
Then I have a really good picture of son at about two years old sitting in – not on – the commode - only his head and legs can be seen. I use this picture for blackmail purposes.
So, I finally got my furniture rearranged the way I want it this time. I’m sure I’ll change my mind in about three months or so and have to do it all over again. One thing I won’t change - are the pictures on the wall.
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